Creating a Happy, Colorful, Handmade Home & life on the shores of lake superior

December 20, 2012

Why I'm a Bad Wife: Part II

Last year, so many of you got a kick out of my special anniversary post, chronicling why I'm a bad wife.  Did you think there were so few reasons?  I'm flattered.  I have a whole second list, in honor of our fourth wedding anniversary (which is today!) . . .


11.  Hubby had to come to Hungary with a mostly empty suitcase and completely empty carry-on (that must have looked suspicious) to trek home all the stuff I bought here.  Really Hubs, three pairs of gotch?  Why so fancy pants?

12.  Hubby gets volun-told for a lot of tasks.  Like painting my Grandma's fence.  Replacing my Mom's door knob.  Shimmying into my parents' attic to lay insulation.  And, for 2013, making a treadle desk for a member of my PhD thesis committee! 

 
13.  I'm still learning the words to songs he hates, but now I'm insisting he learn half so we can do duets on road trips.




14.  I don't know how it comes across in text, but in 3D I'm quite the cut up - always cracking jokes and making funny faces.  But I'll never be a great comedian because, even if it goes over like a lead balloon, I won't bury a bit.  Until laptops become obsolete, every time I have an open laptop across from Hubby's open laptop I will yell, "You sunk my battleship!" (even if it gets the Hubby eye-roll).  I also laugh so hard at my own jokes that sometimes I can't get the punchline out, but Hubby patiently waits for me to get it together.  

15.  To celebrate our one month of being married, we made a scrap book of the wedding day.  Oh gosh, if his work buddies knew his list of skills include gluing pretty corners on pictures . . .


He looks happy enough, but I'm sure he's glad scrapbooking and I didn't really get along.  Ask me if we ever finished that damn scrapbook? Stupid scrapbook.

16. I am a typo-making machine.  Despite all my edu-macation, I also make oodles of grammatical errors.  As a result, Hubby is well versed in feminist theory and philosophy from editing everything I have ever written, since we started dating (back in high school for those keeping track).  Oh, and he has the login info for the blog, to fix mistakes here too.  It's more efficient to cut out the middle man on that one.

17.  He's my favorite treasure hunting partner in crime, even though he hates the smell of all thrift stores and most antique stores.  Yard saling he likes, because it involves sunshine, driving and the occasional hot dog.  But here he is, in one of my favorite antique shops (loitering near the door, by the way).


18.  He thinks it's super swell I'm so into action movies while other wives insist on watching The Notebook again.  Yup, I'm into action movies alright.

Muscliness Via
Suuuuure I'll watch The Transporter, or Transporter 2, or Transporter 3, or The Italian Job, or Death Race, or The Bank Job.

19.  I put a copy of Twilight in his hands and told him it was about vampires.  He is so removed from popular culture, he had no idea it wasn't on par with Blade!  He read all four books (even if you hate the first one, how can you not want to know how it ends?), called it "literary crack" and is now wary of all my recommendations.  I think admitting, on the internet, that I read the series myself is penance enough, no?


20.  I tell anyone with ears (or an internet connection) that Hubby used to cut my hair.  I'm not sure this is something he wants to brag about, given my propensity for volunteering him for tasks (a high school teacher once asked if Hubs was available for appointments) and also because this skill might fall under the same category as "scrap booking," when it comes to being teased horribly by friends.  But I'm so proud of him!  He did such a good job that I am seriously considering going for the DIY'd choppy cut again.  Where are the kitchen scissors??

Me, circa High School graduation time, rocking my DIY hairdo.  Oh boy that was a long time ago.

Happy Anniversary, Handy Hubby.  Thanks for loving me, even when I rook you into another trip to the thrift store by pretending we're going to Le Baron.

That's us, on our wedding day!

 
P.S. Tonight, (on the night of our wedding anniversary, remember? I didn't), we're meeting my Hungarian friend to go to a pottery painting place, then we're meeting up with her boyfriend and making palacsinta (Hungarian crepes).  I'm just getting a jump start on next year's list.
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December 20, 2011

Why I'm a Bad Wife

I look shifty because I'd been pestering him before and after this shot was taken.
What was I doing?  Taking thousands of close-up photos of the sun shining through his beard. 
Apparently that is annoying.

Today Hubby & I celebrate our three year wedding anniversary!  In honour of that, here are some of the reasons I'm a bad wife:

1. Even though I'm a feminist, I vehemently argue that jobs like "figure out where the dead animal smell is coming from" is a "man's job".

2. I re-organize the cabinets and closets when he's gone but pretend I didn't.

Nope, always been there honey!

3. I leave dangerous obstacles in the shower.  I take baths so these so-called "obstacles" pose no threat to me, but apparently Hubby knocks things like this over while hurling himself in and out of the shower and rustling the shower curtain to and fro.

Hey, I'm trying to be thrifty and get the last little bit of conditioner out of the bottle.

4. I also deem centipede squishing "man's work".  All I can do is deafen them with my shrill screams.

5. I like throw pillows.  I like throw pillows that have a "right" way to being put back after someone has flung them from the sofa (zippers facing down, please) and I routinely police the putting back of pillows.


6. I introduced him to cashmere.  That was mean.  He hates spending money on clothes but once you wear cashmere you can't go back to itchy (more affordable) merino wool that easily.  Mwahahaha.

But it wants you to want its wool.
Source

7. Changing the sheets is also a "man's job" (my arms aren't long enough).

8. I shout lengthy, "genius" ideas for him to write down while I'm in the bathroom.  The best ideas come to me when I'm in the bathtub but I forget them by the time I get out.  Keeping paper in the bathroom yielded soggy, unimpressive results. 

9. I learn the lyrics to songs that annoy him (but not on purpose).  But then I sing them all the time and off-key, kinda on purpose.






10. I'm not always looking out for him.  In my defense, in this case I was so focused on taking a good shot I didn't see the giant wave about to soak him.  P.S. Those are my flip flops he's holding.


At least he kept my flip flops dry.

Thanks for loving me anyway Hubby. 


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